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Know These 5 Things For Your First Swing: Tips For First Time Swingers
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Know These 5 Things For Your First Swing: Tips For First Time Swingers

Posted By sylph     January 29, 2015    





The first time you discuss swinging with your partner can be a bit….nerve wrenching.  So if you have gotten past that stage and are now approaching your first date with another couple or  your first time at swinger party there are a couple of things you should be sure to know. Let’s face it, swinging is about having fun and making love. There are different rules for everyone but these are the basic how-tos for newbie swingers.     


Simply put swinging is VERY much like monogamous dating. You should be at your best presentation because, just like with dating, who you impress affects who you will have success with. Don’t wear your high school gym shorts to a black tie event because you want people to know you keep it simple. Show up and show odd. If you have been having a bad day then it might be great to go out for a party to get your mind off of things. If you are having a miserable day, your head is aching beyond repair and you feel off about a soon coming swinger date then just do the mature thing and cancel the date.  Misery might love company but she does not need it!  

This also means be you sexually. Know offhand what you are and are not into and what you are willing to try. For couples you should have discussed and set boundaries regarding all the things that occur in your relationship and can occur in a swinglationship, including: kissing, different room play and phone number sharing. Honesty is key and cannot be over said or over done. In this case being honest with yourself can save you a lot of trouble and grant you a lot of fun. Joining a swinger website like allows you to personalize your profile so that you can list your preferences and filter your search for other swingers. Talk about the fast track, right? 


More than just helping you find other swingers and singles who match with you, swinging sites can help you find the swing club for your style. If you know that BDSM is something you want to see to get you turned on then definitely attend parties that advertise BDSM themes and have demonstrations and classes. If you think that dancing, drinking and maybe a little spontaneous room play is more your speed then you should attend parties like this upcoming one, a special little Valentine’s Day Treat hosted by us  

It is also very smart for you to have an idea of what kind of activity you are ready to participate in and are willing to view. This is especially true if your first party is a private party with a couple or a swinger veteran. You may have a distaste for anal (no pun intended) but if you don’t express that in advance you might walk in on a colonoscopy fantasy with a nurse outfit bleached and ready for you! Know what type of play you want and you will probably meet people more like your style and more attractive/attracted to you.  


Attraction is not the end result and as we discussed earlier this month, you can definitely find someone attractive and still have a hard time getting it on. If you are on the market for a swinger (what a delicious market that would be!) you may want to follow these golden conversation rules. No politics, race or religion. Just don’t do it. In the comfort of your own home and with a very intimate relationship this rule can be ignored. However, for the first time swingers you may want to give a list of info; a resume of sorts to the people that you are partying with. Trust me, just save the communication for the fun stuff. 


While communication is a stepping stone there is an element of romance that is bred and fed off the unsaid. That means there are times when being honest is more about being silent than saying anything. If you or your spouse meets someone and immediately you ask to put their fingers down your crack so they can get a taste of you, you MIGHT get a warm respond. Or you might get a really cold one and come off as disrespectful. For a lot of people swinging is more about intimacy than sex and  being too frank is not advised. Speak with your eyes. Speak with your dance moves. Speak with your smile. All of these tools can be used to indicate attractiveness as well as or even better than words. Of course you should exchange some words once the mime-foreplay is over but remember to be mature and respectful even when discussing plans in the bedroom.  


So you and your spouse are about to do the deed. You danced the night away at a fun party, met some sexy people and exchanged numbers, went through your rules and are heading home with a sexy single lady who you both want to bend into a figure eight. You head to the hotels but can’t quite complete your date. You forgot your necessary items at home. Now most people will be thinking condoms but when it comes to the act of sex there are A BUNCH of things that a person may need to bring along.  

The most basic list of things you should have to ‘play’: 

  • The obvious for both men and woman (condoms) 

  • A towel to dry off after shower 

  • Shower rag and body wash/soap 

  • Lotion/ deodorant/makeup for reapplication 

  • Toothbrush/ toothpaste/ mouthwash 

  • Toys  (which is really one or many of any of these things - vibrators, cock-rings, paddles, strap-ons, dildos, clamps, costume changes pole chalk, chokers, leashes, whips, restraints….this list gets exhaustive) 

  • Music/ Movies (Now whether or not you should play porn at a swinging event is another topic entirely, but in short you really should be more occupied with the 3-D sexual vibes at any play party.) 

I hope this can help you shake your first-timer jitters. Look forward to warm welcomes and sexy fun February  14th. If one night in erotic heaven is not enough for you join us at the hottest nude resort this memorial day, MWL takes over Jamaica. Look forward to polls about What to bring to a Play Party, What Kind of Swinger Club Turns You On and What Is Your Swinging Style…and of course more blog posts from our sexy MWL members.  

Have a fun, sexy and safe time! 

Nelle xxx 





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  • TeeTee71
    TeeTee71  · February 24, 2015
    Great advice. Thank you.
  • sylph
    sylph  · February 8, 2015
    would love to see you guys too!
  • wildduecez
    wildduecez  · January 30, 2015
    well done
  • sni777
    sni777  · January 30, 2015
    Awesome advice!! We're not new but we're also not vets either so this was still helpful!!